The First Time I Tried Starting a Missional Community I Failed
Have you ever tried starting a missional community from scratch?
“Missional” is a label we give to the qualitative and descriptive aspect of how a church or group of people actually lives. My buddy Hugh Halter says it simply,
“It’s about how much like Jesus people become… how much they influence, woo, and transform the culture in which they are placed.”
A family, group of friends or church that lives like this… Sounds good!
Well, a few years ago my friends all thought so too. We were excited to be rebels who were starting a missional community.
Excited, that is, until things progressed to where we moved beyond our weekly meal and discussion about being missional. It was time to start heading out and building new relationships, serving those in need in our city… actually making disciples.
That’s when everyone recoiled a bit.
Let’s Try This Missional Community Thing Again
Now I’ve learned how to make discipleship and mission a reality–something simple that everyone can live out in everyday life.
What I didn’t know back in those earlier days of starting a missional community was that while most Christians want to make disciples and live on mission with God, they also feel way to busy!
Often, when moving toward a lifestyle of discipleship and mission, people become overwhelmed with what they perceive as the risk of their family time, “margins” and sanity!
The secret is moving from “additional” to “intentional” in our thinking.
Discipleship is not a set of activities we need to jam into our lives, or a series classes that we need to take. And a missional community is more than just a weekly meeting of our small group with a name change.
It’s a series of simple, rhythms or “moves” we can easily, and intentionally, engage in our everyday life. Step by step.
Imagine…
- Making new friendships that naturally lead to “doing life” together.
(I can show you how.) - Or knowing how to talk with others about spiritual things without feeling awkward or pushy.
Discipleship becomes a way of life that includes your kids, close friends and neighbors.
That’s what my family and friends now experience.
If you want it… I’m here to get you started without all the headaches, stop/starts and frustration.
The best part? It’s 7 simple steps.
This process takes a little effort and intentionality. But it’s not complicated. And it’s one of the fastest ways I’ve discovered to get started with others making disciples and building community.
(You can do Steps 1 and 2 today!)
I want to give you access to this free Start-Up Guide (including ‘How To Start a Missional Community From Scratch’). Just click the button below and I’ll send it over.
How to Create a Lifestyle of Discipleship
Is discipleship about gaining knowledge, or is it about a transformed life? Is it a series of classes or, like with Jesus and his pals, was it an all-of-life kind of a deal?
In this episode of the Everyday Disciple Podcast, we’re talking about true discipleship and looking at what a lifestyle of discipleship looks like when it is all woven into the normal rhythms of your everyday life in community.
In This Episode You’ll Learn:
- A working definition of discipleship that will reshape your thinking on this immediately
- How Jesus lived life with his disciples and what he then hoped/commanded them to do
- Why a series of 8-10 classes done in a classroom will never produce mature disciples
- Why an integrated lifestyle “apprenticeship” was Jesus’ model for us
Family Dinner Night
My wife Tina and I, have for years, been living out our spirituality–our faith–with others in community. I’m not talking about the “church we go to” but rather intentional community with others that’s focused on living like Jesus would live if he were walking around our neighborhood today.
A big part of living like a family with others is eating together, and OFTEN!
As if it is carved into sacred stone, our extended family–we call it our missional community–gets together for a weekly family dinner night.
These collaborative meals are usually simple, sometimes elaborate, often thrown together, but always warm and full of acceptance. It is a needed bright spot in our week and a time when anyone and everyone are invited in everyone is always invited. At times we will take communion together and go around speaking Good News to each other, pushing back the hurts and disappointments of the week and reminding one another of what is now true of us because of Jesus. Afterward, everyone helps clean up, making sure there is no leftover mess.
As a family, we practice an “open door policy” with one another. I know that I can stop by the home or apartment of those in my community at any time and it will be no big deal. It works in reverse too; my friends know that they can stop by our house any time (I’ve noticed that the single guys seem to practice this more around dinnertime).
This may freak you out a little. You may be thinking, “Whoa, how do you have any time to yourself.
What about boundaries?
There have been times when my wife, Tina, and I are sitting on the couch in the evening having a glass of wine together and the doorbell will ring. “Hey, Caesar. Hi, Tina. What are you guys doing tonight?” And I will say, “Hey, Nick, how you doing brother? Tina and I were just sitting here watching this romantic comedy together and I, um, was kind of hoping for a happy ending…if you know what I mean. So unless there is some emergency or you really need us right now, let’s get together tomorrow if that’s cool.”
Because of the openness and trust we have with one another, there is not only the freedom to open our homes, but we also have the freedom to say “Thanks for stopping by, but now’s not a great time.” We all know this and respect this reality.
But sometimes it’s hard!
Living like this could really spin-off in a bad direction if we don’t live with a focus on the Good News and live with intentionality. If my life is all about my comfort and feeding my preferences, then all of that stuff would be frightening and impossible to sustain. But in light of the love we have been shown, it is a pleasure and a blast to live in ways that show what our real, true heavenly Dad is really like.
Sure it would have been great if someone would have shared these ideas with you or led you into this way of thinking and living years ago, but as always, the next best time to begin…is now!
Question: What’s keeping you from hosting a weekly family dinner for your friends and community? If you’re doing it already, what are you experiencing?
5 Dumb Things Christians Need To Stop Doing
The life of Jesus was and will always be counter-cultural. But often, it seems, we’re not ridiculed or rejected because we’re living such radically loving and selfless lives, it’s because we actually live so little like Jesus.
In this episode, Caesar looks at 5 dumb things that Christians need to stop doing that are affecting our witness and our discipleship efforts. And he gives a little of the gospel “thing behind the thing” with each of these issues.
In This Episode You’ll Learn:
- Why we need to be careful with what we say online.
- How even our most loving actions can be misunderstood.
- The things that Jesus got angry about (are you?).
- How the way we handle conflict reflects our faith.
Your Story…God’s Story
Our favorite singers, songwriters, comedians, preachers, or public speakers all have one thing in common: they know how to tell a good story. And when they finish telling a story I feel connected to it–and them–in some profound way. I can relate in laughter or tears, in agreement or disagreement, but I connect powerfully with the stories they tell.
That’s how it works in the rest of our lives too.
We get to know each other and build friendships by sharing our stories. We are bound together by common themes and the things we have jointly experienced. In fact that is how relationship and community happens…our common stories connect us, and bind us together.
Deep down inside, even if we can’t explain it, we all yearn to be connected to a BIGGER story, to have our lives make a difference and be connected to something more. That is because our lives are all actually part of a much, much larger story. And there is ONE dominant Story that all of our stories will ultimately find their place in and finally be complete because of…that’s God’s Story.
His Story comes before, finishes, corrects, and ultimately makes sense of all other stories.
Every part of our own story, and everyone else’s, is actually a reflection of the Story of God. That is how God has designed things. Our life story, and all of the little pieces that make it up, actually follow the same pattern found in God’s story throughout the Bible, here’s what that looks like:
CREATION➜FALL➜REDEMPTION➜RESTORATION
That’s a pretty quick 4–scene version of the story found in the Bible.
In order to effectively share who God is, what he’s up to in this world and how he’s changing our life, we must learn how to tell our stories through the lens of this larger Story.
Let me quickly share, in each of these scenes, one question that you’ll need to try and answer as you tell your story:
CREATION: The Key Question here is: Who or What most shaped who you thought you were, and where you got your real value and “identity” in life from?
FALL: The Key Question here is: Why was your relationship with God and others, (and anything else in your life), NOT the way it was supposed to be–like God created it to be? How where you rebelling against God and his ways?
REDEMPTION: The Key Question here is: How has Jesus taken the penalty for your rebellion on himself and how you came to put your faith and trust in Him to redeem and restore your life to the way God intended it to be?
RESTORATION: The Key Question here is: What has changed and what is changing in your life now? AND… Who and what is the focus of your life today?
That should help get you started in the right direction…
One more thing: Unfortunately, often when we Christians tell our stories (usually called “sharing our testimony”) we give very little evidence to the fact that we needed to be rescued and restored by God for his glory and Kingdom purposes. And if we do mention God or Jesus in our story, we’ll probably tell of some experience we had at a church service or youth camp…saying a special prayer… Then we talk about how much better our life is going today. And to tell the truth, we don’t usually make ourselves look that bad, and we don’t make God look all that good. We are the primary focus, the hero in our story, but we’re sorta thankful for God’s help along the way.
However, we can learn to tell our stories in a way that shows God is the hero of the story! and will be both salt and light to others; salty like potato chips–after getting started they’ll want to hear more; and light that illuminates a path toward new life with Jesus. So if you’ve been shy in telling your faith story to others or making yourself out to be better than you really are…the next best time to make your story part of THE story is now.
Here’s a link to a free resource: My Gospel Story that will completely expand on all of this and walk you through creating your own story. I hope that helps. I would love to here your story when you finish it!
Discipleship Rhythms For a Community on Mission
Ministry and discipleship cannot merely be a series of events on the calendar. If all we have are organized events, then what we offer people is a program. But, if all we do in our disciple-making is organic and rarely organized or predictable, it is hard for people to know what it is we’re asking them to commit to.
This week on the Everyday Disciple Podcast, Caesar speaks with master disciple-maker, Gino Curcuruto, on how the rhythms of a community on mission very much mirror life as a family. We need both organized and organic rhythms. We’ll show you how to find and create a balance between them.
In This Episode You’ll Learn:
- Discipleship should not be a program we offer others.
- How to help people understand what we are asking them to commit to.
- The need for both organized and organic rhythms in community.
- How predictable patterns naturally lead to life-on-life together.
POPULAR ARTICLES
- GOSPEL FLUENCY: A RELATIONAL GAME-CHANGER!
- WHAT ARE THE (NEW) SIGNS OF A HEALTHY CHURCH?
- SHIFTING YOUR SMALL GROUPS TO VIBRANT MISSIONAL COMMUNITIES
- WHY DADDIES SHOULD DATE THEIR DAUGHTERS
- HOW TO PRAY FOR YOUR CHILD’S FUTURE SPOUSE
- LIFESCHOOL 122: HOW TO CREATE A LIFESTYLE OF DISCIPLESHIP
- ARE YOU WASTING TIME DEVELOPING THE WRONG PEOPLE?
- THESE 3 THINGS ARE TRUE DISCIPLESHIP KILLERS
- STORY OF GOD
ABOUT ME
I am the author of the top selling book, The Gospel Primer. My latest books, Transformed and Small is Big, Slow is Fast came out recently on Zondervan.
I help those with a high commitment to intentional living in the areas of their discipleship, family and mission acquire the leadership skills and tools necessary to succeed and leave a lasting legacy.